Faces of Death arrived to much fanfare from horror movie sites and much confusion from normal movie goers, reflected in the film’s poor box office performance. A friend of mine wondered why they would re-release the film after all these years and then, after reading the plot synopsis, asked, “Why?”

I understand that reaction and I understand why the filmmakers decided to requel (thanks SCREAM for that term) this film series (yes, there were more than one! There were 6, with the most recent one I can remember coming out in 1996. These films and the Guinea Pig series from Japan (and also the American versions) were some of the films I built my horror foundation on as a film viewer growing up.) and I don’t fault them. It’s a good approach to making a “mainstream” FoD film and it works, to a point. 

So where does it work? The film’s decision to recreate the original deaths from the first film was a good call and making it about content moderation at a terrible social media company was a solid call. We have all seen the pieces on various news sites or on our social feeds that talk about how awful these jobs can be and it works very well here as a social commentary too boot. The acting is solid, and the actors all commit to the bit and the effects were top notch (except for the acid bath scene…that reeked of unfinished VFX).

Where does it fail? The writing continually deus ex machina’s the plot to make it work out for our protagonist. From the VHS of Faces of Death (which according to the film is the only place it can be seen, but you—reader—can watch it now on TUBI!) being just to the right of her couch at home when she needs a copy of the very hard to find controversial and underground film to the misuse of narcan to prevent an overdose before an overdose was administered (it works to counteract the drug but it does not work like that!), it is just bad plotting. And the characters are all obnoxious. All of them.  I was actively rooting for the heroine to die and the villain to triumphantly rule the internet by offing himself on live stream too, King of Pigs style. It was not to be though and the annoying protag did protag stuff and won the day. But that is not FoD26’s biggest problem. Not even close.

The biggest problem with the film is that it cannot compare to real life. For decades now, I personally have been exposed to far worse things than anything this film can summon. I’ve seen people commit suicide, be macheted to death in acts of cartel violence, die in horrific car crashes, shoot themselves in the face, etc. and that is just on YouTube and regular social media (Instagram is home to 1,000,000 deaths before breakfast each day and those make it through moderation which is something the film utterly fails to critique). If you want even more extreme stuff, you can visit Best Gore (yes it is still around!) or whatever passes for steakandcheese.com these days. FoD26 has nothing on what I have witnessed just being a person on the internet. So I imagine the only audience that will appreciate this requel are people who enjoyed the originals.

Moreover FoD26 cannot even compete with television as far as shock value and gross out value goes. 

Now here is where I make a confession, the horrifying picture at the top of the article? It’s not from the film I am reviewing here. I’ll give you a second to guess where it came from.

Did you guess the HBO hit series, The Pitt? If so, good job and if not what are you still doing here? Go watch The Pitt and do so now! Why? Every episode is far more shocking than FoD26. 

Every. Single. Episode.  

And no, I am not being hyperbolic. It is a fact. Take the images above. It comes from the absolutely batshit emergency C-section that I saw the night AFTER watching FoD26. I watched in terror and horror as the doctors carved open a woman and pulled a nearly dead infant from her open womb. Guess which stuck with me long after the credits rolled…

So I say again, this film is just ok. You don’t need to watch it and you aren’t missing out on some great horror flick by passing. If you really want to watch it, wait for FoD26 to show up on TUBI (it will someday) and in the meantime watch The Pitt instead. There are two seasons that will leave you shaken and deeply affected.